Now it came about when he had finished speaking to Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as himself."  (1 Sam 18:1 NASB)

Aristotle defined friendship as one soul in two bodies.  You would think that he was describing Jonathan and David.  The Bible teaches that, although each soul is distinct and precious, it is possible to have our souls knit together in the loving bonds of friendship.

Leading not only involves LOVING and EXAMPLING. Leading involves ASKING. Ask others to join the journey, to take the next step, to stretch their stride, to raise the bar, take the next hurdle, take the next hill, and realize the next goal. Do not be afraid to ask people to help you solve a problem. We need to ask others to consider new possibilities and dream great dreams. Leaders help others realize their goals. Leaders develop teams and promote teamwork. Jesus invited others to join Him- "Co ...

It has been said that ours is a generation of managers. What we need today is leaders. Managers manage things. Leaders lead people. Managers coordinate projects, priorities, schedules, plans and budgets. Leaders motivate people to take purposeful action. They inspire people to journey together towards a worthy goal.

What can we do to effectively lead people? Let me furnish a list in the form of an acrostic: L-E-A-D.

Leading begins by LOVING. Jesus demonstrate ...

To ensure that we are personally optimized for making the most important and foundational connection of our lives, 'THE Connection of All Connections', we must start with a basic diagnostic question: "What must you DO to put yourself in a right relationship with God?"

The answer: "It's too late." It's already been DONE. What is needed to be put into a right relationship with God has already been done for us. The connection is available to us as a free gift. T ...

"As unreliable as a faulty (deceitful) bow." (Psalm 78:57 NIV). "They turn, but not upward, They are like a deceitful bow." (Hosea 7:16 NASB).

A deceitful bow is one whose arrows cannot keep a straight trajectory. To the dismay of the archer, the bow sends the arrow towards a destination other than the one targeted. Although the arrow is properly aimed, it goes astray when launched because the firing instrument malfunctio ...

Reflections on the Millennial Turn-Over

"'I will shake all nations, and the desired of all nations will come, and I will fill this house with glory,' says the LORD Almighty." (Haggai 2:7 NIV).

It is ironic that the One whose prophetic title is "the desired of all nations", is currently treated by t ...

Somehow the dedicated 'self-life' is convinced that it can play the part of the Christian, despite all evidence to the contrary. It continually auditions for the role, insisting that it is capable of virtue, self-sacrifice and 'ever so humble' heroics. The official notification fails to register that the part has already been duly cast to Christ Himself. He is the only One fit for fulfilling its demands. The role of the Christian requires a divine performance in the spirit of the believer. The Chri ...

A gift has added significance when there is a story behind it. I received such a gift this Christmas. It was actually created in my presence during the previous months without me realizing it. On Christmas Eve the gift was personally delivered in a box that was wrapped in such a way that when you took the cover off, the handsome gift paper stayed intact. Ingenious! You could easily restore the gift to the original wrapped box so that it looked as if it had never been opened. If you so desired, you ...

The person of Jesus Christ is indispensable to Christianity. Christianity is Christ. While others have given the world philosophies and religion, Jesus came to give the world Himself. Other teachers have taught their developed philosophies and disciplines. Jesus gave us a life-system that only works with Himself as the central governing force of it.

The person of Jesus Christ is indispensable to our own lives. The core of Christ's teaching has to do with the fact that He has com ...

There are some who would say that Christianity is based upon a 'mythological' Christ. Yet the written accounts of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John regarding the person and works of Jesus of Nazareth bear no resemblance to legend or myth. Instead they have the distinctive attributes one would expect of 'realistic history'.

1. The gospels bear no resemblance to legends in literary style. C.S. Lewis, Oxford Professor and literary historian writes, "As a literary h ...

As popular news magazines give their polite nod to Christianity’s entrance into its third millennium and chronicles its spread throughout the world at the end of its twentieth century, (an ironic phenomena, considering the bold predictions of its demise by such writers as Voltaire, H.G.Wells, and Frederich Nietzsche) it is remarkable how reporters fail to recognize the driving force that causes it to flourish. What propels Christianity is something more than the moral example and teaching of its fo ...

"I saw three ships come sailing in," are the opening words of a traditional English Christmas Carol. A later verse discloses the writer's ignorance of Mid-Eastern geography when the holy family is pictured sailing into Bethlehem as if it were a seaport, "on Christmas Day in the morning." Perhaps the carol was authored by a maritimer wanting as significant a tie-in to the sacred story as the local shepherd!

I would like to take the liberty to use the image of ...

"In your anger do not sin : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold." (Ephesians 4:26-27 NIV).

To feel anger is no more a sin than it is to feel pain. Anger is merely an emotional response to a perceived injustice. Anger is also disguised as feeling hurt, cheated or frustrated. The danger with anger, however, is that it more often leads to des ...

A missionary couple had been working in the Middle East when they noticed that a dove had settled under the eaves of their simple home. Because the dove is a symbol of the Holy Spirit in Scripture, they were pleased to have the gentle bird dwelling among them.

When Jesus was baptized by John at the river Jordan, the Holy Spirit descended upon Him in a bodily shape like a dove. A voice came from heaven, saying, "This is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased" ...

One evening during a particularly demanding season in my life, I stood on the church steps feeling fully expended. As I contemplated the immediate future I was overwhelmed with a sense of my own insufficiency. I did not see how I could go on doing what I was doing. "The grace has left me." I confessed.

I got in the car and drove home. Later that night I went outdoors for a prayer-walk and continued to pour my complaint out before the Lord. I had the immediate awareness ...

The phrase 'falling in love' can be misleading, as if the experience of love were merely accidental. Somehow you tripped, stumbled and were overcome by an abstract force. Real love involves a conscious choice. Often 'falling in love' is a trick that our hormones and imaginations play on us. People fall in love not with another person but with their 'idea' of who that other person is and what their relationship will be like in the future. There is an element of reality distortion as they imagine rid ...

Think of relationships that have worked in your life. Think of those that haven't. What have you learned from these experiences?

There is an enduring quality to what we call 'covenant relationships'; relationships where there is a mutual understanding and commitment to making God's love credible to another, be it a spouse, a friend, family member, colleague or stranger.

Marriage is the binding together of two lives with the understanding that each is committe ...

Jesus Christ, was to some, a difficult person. A perfect person, but difficult nonetheless. When the wedding celebration Jesus attended at Cana was in danger of becoming a social disaster, His mother gave him a nudge: "They have no wine" . (The male interpretation of this statement from the ancient 'Womanese' language means: "Do something about it.") Jesus responded: "Woman, what do I have to do with you?" ( "What hav ...

"Early in the morning, as he (Jesus) was on his way back to the city, he was hungry. Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, 'May you never bear fruit again!' Immediately the tree withered." (Matthew 21:19).

The fig tree was originally created, like all things, for God's glory. It was designed to provide the blessing of food an ...

This morning I write from Israel after a time of meditation in the Garden of Gethsemane.

The thick gnarled trunks of this ancient grove of olive trees resemble rugged hands firmly clasped together with finger-like branches curving loosely upwards as if to mirror those of supplicants throughout the centuries who have postured themselves in prayer beneath their welcoming shade.

It is not difficult to imagine why this garden spot was a customary place of prayer ...

When Silas and Timothy came from Macedonia, Paul devoted himself exclusively to preaching, testifying to the Jews that Jesus was the Christ. (Acts 18:5 NIV).

Effective team work allows each team player to utilize their strengths towards the achievement of the common objective.

The Apostle Paul had an influence that went further than he could have ever imagined. His encounter with the resurrected Christ and his dramatic turn from being the feared persecutor of ...

"..Justice is driven back, and righteousness stands at a distance; truth has stumbled in the streets, honesty cannot enter." These words describe the perils of a society that leaves its moral moorings, denies the existence of Truth as an absolute, and sets sail only to drown in the sea of relativism (Isaiah 59:14).

Truth has stumbled in the streets. It did not fall on its own accord. Truth only stumbles when thos ...

There are 366 admonitions to "fear not" in the Bible. You might say there is one for every day of the year, with an extra one thrown in for leap year.

The admonition to "Be not afraid" would not be so prevalent if fear were not so common. Many pretend they are not afraid yet have adopted behaviors that are controlled by fears. They fear failure, fear poverty, fear the disapproval or rejection of others. We fear unpleasant circumstances. Some fear intimacy. Ot ...

A life without conflict would be a life where there is little growth. A life without struggle would lead to a life of mediocrity. Life without challenges in our personal relationships would be a life without the development of the important aspects of love known as the fruit of the Spirit. These qualities of character are not developed in isolation. They are perfected in the rough and tumble of our ongoing struggles in human relationships. It is here that we grow in humility, forbearance, patience, ...

An article appearing in the August 17th 1999 edition of The New York Times featured the results of a study from Duke University indicating that active involvement in a community of faith may be as big a factor in increasing longevity as refraining from smoking cigarettes. Dr. Harold Koenig reports that "Persons attending religious services once a week or more were physically and mentally healthier, had larger support networks and more confidants, and lived healthier lifestyles."

It has been said that motivation is what gets you started and habit is what keeps you going. Habitual actions, or customary practices, can either promote or undermine our progress towards reaching our lifetime goals.

The life of Jesus of Nazareth puts our thoughts about human life in proper perspective. Jesus stands as the paragon of what is best about humanity. His example and influence are without equal. His life and teaching revealed the truth about both humanity and deity. J ...

In this issue:

• An Update on "T.G.I.M."
• The Walden Woods Ministry Center Project
& ...

The largest timber framed building in the USA is a 31,000 square foot church in Powell Ohio. It was constructed under the supervision of the Amish master barn-builder Josie Miller and was the 500th barn-like structure built by Josie and his crew. The joints of each beam were cut by hand.

As Josie and his sons looked over the designs for the new building and explained the construction process to the workers they would refer to the beams as 'fellows' and 'guys'. They'd say things ...

I've been told that there was a problem with the early designs of ejection seats for military aircraft. When pilots needed to ditch their crippled planes in mid-air, they would eject from the cockpit while still remaining comfortably strapped in their seats. Many rode their falling armchairs to their peril, never breaking away to pull the ripcord and activate their parachute. Pilots preferred the comfort of riding the chair to their deaths than taking the necessary risk to break away into a freefal ...

"Do not call anything impure that God has made clean." (Acts 10:15 NIV).

Our standards of whether or not something is pure and acceptable are not always the same as God's.

It is a subtle temptation to measure a person's spirituality by their outward conformity to a certain code of behavior. For example, the Apostle Peter took pride in the fact that he had never eaten anyth ...

Not long after his conversion, Augustine was walking down the streets of Milan when a prostitute with whom he once had intimate acquaintance beckoned him: "Augustine! It is I!" He slowed down and with the newfound assurance of Christ's Spirit living in his heart, turned to her and replied: "Yes, but it is no longer I!"

The Apostle Paul put it this way: "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I li ...

If you look up 'caterpillar' in an encyclopedia or dictionary, you will find it defined in terms of its future as a butterfly: "A caterpillar is the wormlike, often brightly colored, hairy or spiny larva of a butterfly or moth."

Prior to its metamorphosis into a butterfly, the caterpillar's visual perception may be so limited that it is unlikely that it can recognize the existence of the colorful winged butterfly in flight, much less make the connection with that it ha ...

When it comes to speaking about our final departure we are often lost for words. We are heavily influenced by our culture which either denies or fears the reality of the 'D' word.

Woody Allen says, "I'm not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens."

Men who delighted in their earthly riches, such as Louis XIV or William Randolph Hearst, forbade the mention of the word 'death' in their presence.

The young do ...

Why is it that happiness eludes some people? It very well could be that they are clueless as to what it means to be 'blessed'.

The Book of Psalms gives us seven specific ways to be blessed. The word 'blessed' ('esher' in the Hebrew) is derived from a word meaning 'to be level, right, happy and make progress'. 'To be blessed' is to be spiritually prosperous and happy as a result of a right relationship with God and others. A relationship flourishes when you are in loving 'on the ...

The voice of Darrell Scott, the father of two victims of the tragic Columbine High School shootings in Littleton, Colorado, rises above the cacophony of commentary about the increase of violence in our nation. He courageously directs us to the spiritual nature of a problem that calls for a spiritual solution.

TESTIMONY OF DARRELL SCOTT FATHER OF TWO VICTIMS OF THE COLUMBINE HIGH SCHOOL SHOOTINGS LITTLETON, COLORADO BEFORE THE SUBCOMMITTEE ON CRIME HOUSE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE UNITE ...

A recent study published in a popular business magazine revealed that the three qualities that distinguished 'champion' Chief Executive Officers from the many who fumble in leadership were: Integrity, maturity and energy. (Fortune Magazine, June 21 Issue, 1999)

What comes to your mind when you hear these words? Integrity. Maturity. Energy.

'Integrity' comes from the word 'integer' which means 'complete', or 'sound'; It is the state of being 'a whole', in cont ...

"For you, O God, tested us; you refined us like silver. You brought us into prison and laid burdens on our backs. You let men ride over our heads; we went through fire and water, but you brought us to a place of abundance (a place of rich fulfillment)." (Psalms 66:10-12).

God wants us to be prosperous in the truest sense (See Jeremiah 29:11). But the way to prosperity is often fraught with dif ...

How would you like to be known as a "Dispeller of Shame"? There is one character in the Bible who bore the name, "Dispeller of Shame". His personal story gives us insight as to how shame, the emotional consequence of one's true guilt and one's fall from a good standing, can be forever dispelled.

Jonathan, the son of King Saul, had a son who was lame in both feet. His name was Mephibosheth (literally 'Dispeller of shame'). According to the Bible, Mephibosheth ...

"The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" (Jeremiah 17:9 NIV).

In Jay Tolson's thought-provoking article* of May 10, 1999 published in US News and World Report, he observes that our nation's vast 'explanation' industry is failing to come to grips with incidents of horrific violence, such as the recent Littleton shootings, because it has lost a vocabulary ...

"Be sure you know the condition of your flocks, give careful attention to your herds; for riches do not endure forever, and a crown is not secure for all generations." (Proverbs 27:23-24 NIV).

In his book, "Leadership is an Art", Max Depree confesses that one of the most challenging jobs of a leader is "the interception of entropy". Things that have worked well in the past, ...

The masked gunman confronted the Christian teenager in the high school library where he found her studying her Bible. He raised his gun to her head and asked, "Do you believe in God?" The shy seventeen year old took a breath that she knew might be her last and then spoke up in a voice loud enough to be heard by her classmates who were taking cover under nearby desks and tables, "Yes, I believe in God."

"Why?" the gunman responded mockingly. Before C ...

Winds of spiritual deception can quickly blow us off course. When we least suspect it we can find ourselves down dead-end tributaries, in perilous waters or marooned on some island of isolation. As John Bunyan reminds us in his "Pilgrim's Progress" it is easy to turn off the correct path to the Celestial City because we are tempted by a promised shortcut through an attractive "Bypass Meadow".

Not all visions are created equal. If our personally 'envisioned fu ...

It was meant to be a criticism. The apostle Paul said "Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual...Are you not acting like mere men?" (1Corinthians 3:1,3).

The humanist celebrates the virtues, values and capacities of the human being as if they were 'the ultimate'. Paul argues that such vision is short-sighted. Left to itself the human race is bound to a course of self-destruction. Envying, strife and divisions sabotage its progress on every fro ...

In Lewis Carroll's childhood classic "Alice in Wonderland", when Alice comes to a crossroads and does not know which road to take, she turns to the Cheshire cat for advice.  The cat asks, "Where are you going?" Alice replies, "I don't know." The cat responds, "Well if you don't know where you are going, any road will do very nicely."

How is your sense of direction in life? Do you know where you are going? Or will 'any road' suffic ...

The front page article in the Easter Sunday edition of The Boston Globe began with a compelling lead: "The resurrection is not for sissies. It is either an unproveable murder mystery story or the most profound miracle of the Christian faith." ¹

Most legal and historical experts would dispute the claim that the case surrounding the resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth is anything similar to an 'unproveable' murder mystery. There is an overwhelming am ...

Columbia University's Melvin Mencher, author of the classic journalism textbook, "News Reporting and Writing", 'news' as reports containing:

1. Information about an important interruption or change in the usual or expected unfolding of events and
2. Information people need to make intelligent decisions about their lives.

He also cites 7 other factors to determine 'newsworthiness':

I thought I could avoid it. The hoopla and hosannas. I'm talking about the Academy Award Celebration in Hollywood. I could just as well be talking about the college basketball championships. America's religious involvement with sport and entertainment is near its zenith. In fact, this year the Hollywood ritual of bequeathing the golden statuette, the Oscar, moved to what most seem to believe is its proper place - the Sabbath.

I was especially hopeful that I might miss the ubiqui ...

"I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received." (Ephesians 4:1 NIV).

In his book titled "The Odyssey", John Sculley tells how Steve Jobs, founder of Apple Computer, challenged him when he was then the 38 year old president of Pepsi-Cola: "Do you want to spend the rest of your life selling sugared water or do you want a chance to change the world?"

The twentieth century was supposed to be the 'humanitarian' century where respect and compassion would be shown towards all human life. Instead it has been a century of 'human genocide'. Over 100 million innocent people have been exterminated through systematic policies of mass murder in this century. Millions of Armenians, Jews, Chinese, Russians, Cambodians, Sudanese, the peoples of Rwanda, Croatia and elsewhere, not to mention the unborn children of the womb, were victims of the murderous polici ...

In the book titled "Working", author Studs Terkel interviewed ordinary people, asking them how they felt about their jobs.

A 28 year old woman writing health care literature responded, "Jobs are not big enough for people. It's not just the assembly line worker whose job is too small for his spirit, you know. A job like mine, if you really put your spirit into it, you would sabotage immediately. You don't dare. So you absent your spirit from it. My mind has been so ...

One of the things that distinguishes the Christian in the workplace is the redefinition of what is the 'bottom line'. The bottom line is not merely the line on a financial report showing the net income or loss. The most important issue for the believer is not just the maintenance of a profit margin, increase in sales, or customer satisfaction. It is more than the pursuit of excellence or realizing a productivity goal. The bottom line is ultimately to please God. Jesus said "Make the k ...

How can we make good decisions?

We are where we are today to a great extent because of the decisions that we have made in the past. Where we will be in the future will largely be the result of the decisions that we make today.

If the outcome of our lives is based upon our ability to make good decisions, it is of primary importance that we have wisdom.

Solomon asked for wisdom, above wealth, r ...

"Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." (Psalms 90:12 NIV).

A fable is told of a man who was walking home along a river's shore in the dark. He stumbled upon a bag of stones which he picked up. As a pastime he threw the stones one by one into the river, enjoying the 'ker-plunk' of each stone breaking the water's surface. When he arrived home he had only two st ...

On the second day of our vacation trip to California, my wife and I had just entered the hotel room when we noticed the flashing red light on the telephone indicating that an incoming voicemail message was waiting for us. When we entered the code numbers required for its retrieval, we heard a recording of our oldest son, Jonathan, more than three thousand miles away on the east coast, asking us to call home as soon as possible. He calmly said it was important and he wanted to speak with us personal ...

Over three years ago I launched a Monday morning meditation to remind 'on-the-job agents' of the Kingdom that they can actually ENJOY and MAXIMIZE their strategic assignments in the workplace. Last Monday was the first in three years that I missed writing a T.G.I.M. meditation. I must admit that I was happily away from any laptop or modem, skiing the snowy slopes of New England, enjoying an extended weekend skiing with my son and good friends from our faith community.

Whereas th ...

January 7 1999. It was not an ordinary day in Washington. The image broadcasted from the Senate Chamber was unforgettable. The usually vociferous group of politicians was suddenly silenced. A solemnity fell over the House that has sometimes been called "The Cave of Winds" because it is the home of those who are fond of hearing their own voices in rowdy debate. Two student pages opened the French doors at the rear of the Chamber and the Chief Justice appeared in a black gown with gold stri ...

In 1998 both Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire fulfilled their goals in breaking the previous records for home run hits in a single baseball season. Roger Maris beat Babe Ruth's record and held it for 37 years with 61 home runs. Last year Sosa topped that by 5, with 66, and McGwire, by 9 with an astounding 70.

All the articles and interviews with McGwire's coaches and teammates seem to indicate three dominant factors contributing to his success in accomplishing his goal: a dauntless d ...

"A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, 'Teacher, don't you care if we drown?' He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, 'Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?' They were terrified and asked each other, 'Who is this? ...

"Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain." (Psalms 127:1 NIV).

The Scriptures remind us that we must be both disciplined and dependent in God's work. The psalmist envisions God's people at work building His house and the watchmen actively watching over His concerns. He is also seeing that it is ultima ...

The Discipline of Grace sounds like an oxymoron- the linking together of contradicting terms (e.g.., deafening silence, solemn celebration, jumbo shrimp). We associate 'grace' with the free gift of God's love, the full pardon and acceptance we find when we bow in recognition of Christ's sacrifice for us. The word 'discipline' reminds us of demands that stretch us, rules that constrain us and rigorous regimens that challenge us out of our comfort zone. We tend to equate 'grace' with a 'freedom of al ...

(Look and Live)

For five years, I lived a block away from a little chapel tucked away on a side street in Colchester, England, that has its special claim to fame. On a snowy day in 1850, a young teen named Charles Spurgeon walked up Hythe Hill alone and came out of the wintry cold and sat in a back pew. The worship service was late getting started. Because of the adverse weather conditions, the scheduled itinerant Methodist preache ...

Through the centuries, believers have questioned: "Which is the way that leads to holiness?" Is holiness obtained through rigorous routines of self-discipline or is it automatically ours if we passively 'let go and let God'? Is the truth found somewhere in-between? What is our response to Jesus' command to "Be perfect as your father in heaven is perfect?" Is not such perfectionism cruel when we know that "all have sinned and are all presently fal ...

The Mystery of a Well Tuned Biosphere

"The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands." (Psalms 19:1 NIV).

According to writer Paul Johnson "The most extraordinary thing about the 20th century was the failure of God to die. The collapse of mass religious belief, especially among the educated and prosperous, had been widely and confidently predicte ...

"With great ('mega' in the Greek) power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and much ('mega') grace was upon them all." (Acts 4:33 NIV)
"It is a good thing that the heart be established with grace." (Hebrews 13:9 KJV)

To be 'disgraced' is to experience the loss of affirmation, acceptance, honor, favor, and respect. It i ...

After World War II, Robert Woodruff declared his vision: "In my generation it is my desire that everyone in the world have a taste of Coca Cola!" An outrageous goal for an enterprising soft drink enthusiast? Today Coca Cola is known from the deserts of Africa to the interior of China, in every major country of the world. Woodruff was able to motivate his colleagues to reach their generation for Coke.

Nearly two thousand years ago Jesus of Nazareth left his small band o ...

Wholesome Thoughts About Your Life

The Scriptures give us reminders that stimulate us to wholesome thinking (2Peter 3:1). The apostle Peter reminds us that all the pressures and problems of life should not alter our life-focus. We who are born of the Spirit have a capacity to recognize and participate in what God is doing. When facing life's many demands and uncertainties, it is important that we see the big picture. History does n ...

"There are three things that are too amazing for me, four that I do not understand: the way of an eagle in the sky, the way of a snake on a rock, the way of a ship on the high seas, and the way of a man with a maiden." (Proverbs 30:18-19 NIV)

All four are distinctively marvelous as they take their natural courses: The eagle in relationship to the sky, the snake in relationship to the rock, the ...

#5 - How Not to Sabotage a Relationship (Part 4)

(continued from last week)

9. PRACTICE RECONCILIATION AND FORGIVENESS.

In His original plan God never intended for anyone to have a broken heart. But we live in a fallen world where relationships are frail and vulnerable. Relationships are easily put out of joint.

There is a way to heal fracture ...

#4 - How Not to Sabotage a Relationship (Part 3)

(continued from last week)

7. BECOME A GOOD LISTENER.

The ability to listen well can be an invitation to enter the inner world of another person. Those who listen well elicit intimacy. They are able to journey with another person and discover the secret riches of their inner life. "The purposes of a ma ...

#3 - How Not to Sabotage a Relationship (Part 2)

(continued from last week)

HOW NOT TO SABOTAGE GOOD RELATIONSHIPS

Good inter-personal relationships are fundamental for successful living, yet we assume that they will automatically come our way. Little do we realize how our own human depravity and poor social programming have jeopardized our potential to establish ...

#2 - How Not to Sabotage a Relationship

The Book of Proverbs contains numerous practical nuggets of wisdom. A proverb a day can keep many troubles away. Within this collection of short rhyming couplets (distichs) and quatrains, we have a treasury of insights on what is true, right and lasting. Each proverb is an encapsulation of the mind of God on how we are to conduct ourselves in life. Together they unveil some vital principles a ...

#1 - "A righteous man is cautious in friendship." (Proverbs 12:26 NIV).

Relationships require care and nurture. They also require wisdom. Every one of our relationships will reflect our character. Our words and deeds either build or erode the loyalty and trust people voluntarily put in us. We must be careful as we choose and cultivate our friendships.

Within each of our hearts there is a desire for 'u ...

True leadership inspires 'followship'. We follow leaders who demonstrate qualities we admire. True Leaders lead by example rather than the persuasive powers of personality and promises. Character and competence are more important than charisma.

When Daniel was in his eighties and in line to be the prime minister of the Median-Persian Empire under King Darius, he was heavily scrutinized by his opponents. The result of the commission was that they could find no corruption in him. ...

"For out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks" (Matthew 12:34).

Why is it that the human heart so easily utters contempt for the holy? Why is it that even the atheist, who professes not to believe in God, continually insists that "God damn it"? Why is it that people's reflex reactions to surprising situations are to vocalize their lack of submission to the Divine by saying ...

(Joy of Living)

While in France, some Christian friends who were accompanying my wife and me on a preaching tour on the European Continent, joined us at a New Year's Eve party at the home of an agnostic banker just outside of Paris. Although we were among the minority that did not drink alcohol that night, it was clear to many of the party-goers that we all seemed to be having the best time. Animated conversation, loving exchanges, ...

Once during our time of ministry in England, I received a telephone call from a remarkable actor who was appearing in a production in which he played seven different roles on stage. He asked me if I could meet with him after an evening performance. He had received a tape of one of the messages I had preached in London and wanted to know more about spiritual matters. I agreed to meet with him one night at a restaurant near the theater. There he asked me how he could know God in a personal and real w ...

In the second century BC, humankind first catalogued and packaged its grandest ancient self-made marvels as "the seven wonders of the world": the pyramids of Egypt; the Hanging Gardens of Babylon; Phidias's statue of Zeus at Olympia; the temple of Artemis at Ephesus; the tomb, or mausoleum, of King Mausolus at Halicarnassus; the Colossus of Rhodes; and either the Pharos, or lighthouse, at Alexandria or the walls of Babylon.

The apostles saw that the greatest wonder of ...

The prophets, apostles, preachers and teachers of the early church did not see their job as making up sermons. They did not sit down on a weeknight to ponder what would be an interesting subject to speak on next Sunday. They proclaimed what they had realized in their experience of the person of Christ. This is the substance of the church's ministry: to hold and manifest the testimony of Jesus (See 1John 1:1-3). For as the apostle John said, "The testimony of Jesus IS the spirit of pro ...

Recently I was speaking with a man whose cartoons are published daily in our city's newspapers. He was recounting his first days in art school. For the initial term he enrolled in a class taught by an artist whose work he had greatly admired. He was anticipating his first day under this great man's tutelage.

On the first day of classes the professor asked his students, "How many of you have your own personal style?" Eager to have the maturity of his craftsmanship recog ...

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." (Philippians 4:6)

All living organisms experience some degree of stress upon their systems. We are made to be able to manage applied pressures or force systems, physically, mentally and emotionally. Stress is necessary in healthy growth and productivity. But when exce ...

"Without a vision the people perish." (Proverbs 29:18 KJV).

One translation reads: "Without a vision, people go to pieces."

The Apostle Paul confessed to King Agrippa that he was not disobedient to the heavenly vision (Acts 26:19). Once he understood who Christ was and who he was in Christ, he was never the same. Pau ...

Two large plate glass windows and a glass door expose our otherwise dark wood paneled living room to the sunlight of the great outdoors. Forty years after the windows were installed as part of the original construction, the seals of one window deteriorated to the degree that condensation between the panes of glass caused it to fog. Because of the major expense of replacing the glass, we decided to live with it, delaying the repairs until the window was thoroughly tinted with condensation. Because t ...

"For physical training is of some value, but godliness (having God's life consistently manifested in your spirit) has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come." (1Timothy 4:8 NIV , parenthetical explanation, mine)

Today many workplaces are furnished with physical exercise equipment. Personnel managers recognize the effect of enhanced employee perform ...

Frustration is the experience of having your dreams thwarted. That which you have been longing for is now out of reach. Someone pulls the plug on the vision. Something prevents you from accomplishing a purpose or fulfilling a desire. Hope is shattered. The result may be that you are left baffled and discouraged.

Frustration is a form of anger. Anger is an emotional response to a perceived injustice. It is not sin in itself but can easily lead to sin if it is not handled in the r ...

The world's most eminent astronomers and physicists gathered in Poland in the fall of 1973 to commemorate the 500th birthday of Nicolaus Copernicus, the father of modern astronomy. Present were notables such as Stephen W. Hawking, Roger Penrose, Joseph Silk and John Wheeler. Decades later, one scientific lecture is remembered as being revolutionary in significance. Brandon Carter, astrophysicist and cosmologist from Cambridge University delivered a lecture titled, "The Large Number of Coincide ...

In the popular TV series, "Touched by An Angel" we see three generations of angels working as a team on special God-given assignments. They are confronted with human beings in difficult but common life situations that beg for someone to communicate the love of God to them. The angels are sent in to roll up their sleeves rather than show off their wings. They risk getting involved with people. As a result we not only see human lives change, but the angels growing in their understanding.< ...

The story is told of a man who went to visit an old friend who had recently moved to a farm. When he reached the farm he turned onto the long driveway which led to the farmhouse. On the way up the drive he passed by the barn. What he saw there so amazed him that he stopped the car and examined the barn closely. Painted on the side of the barn were twenty shooting targets. Each target had a bullet hole right in the center of the bull's-eye. No other bullet holes could be found on the barn wall. Whoe ...

More heart attacks occur on Monday mornings between 8 and 9 AM than at any other time during the week. This strongly suggests that, for many, a return to the workplace is perceived as stressful.

Stress can also be habit forming and condition our bodies to react in certain ways. A study reported in the New York Times, Sept. 18, 1996 looked at abnormal heart rhythms, known as arrhythmias. A group of patients, mostly males over 50 were planted with defibrillators, miniature electro ...

Intimacy is a word that evokes mixed reactions. It is something we both long for and fear. On one hand, we want to experience closeness in relationships, to be appreciated, cherished and accepted for who we are in our deepest nature. On the other hand, we recognize that true intimacy involves becoming vulnerable, disclosing imperfections and weakness. We want others to feel free to open up to us without fear of judgment. This ongoing mutual self disclosure opens the door for potential hurt, misunde ...

The convenience of speedy electronic mail delivery has put new strains on personal communication. Words quickly typed on a keyboard and fired off into cyberspace can be easily misunderstood. The reader will more than likely be in a different setting, experiencing an entirely different set of circumstances. He or she may be from a different national or business culture. They will read that E-Mail message without any clues of the sender's tone of voice or facial expressions. There are no signals such ...

A whiskey bottle can be emptied of its contents but still smell like whiskey. So a Christian can be emptied of the old sin nature, but still bear the residue of sin in their life. Rather than being a pure new vessel releasing the fragrance of Christ, they bear the stench of the sin that once fully controlled them.

From God's point of view, our old nature of sin has been crucified with Christ (Romans 6:6, Galatians 2:20. 5:24; Colossians 2:20; 3:3). We are no longer alive to sin. ...

Anyone who has tended a 'bittersweet' plant knows that, in spite of its attractive red and orange berries, it is a killer that easily takes over its surroundings. Its underground root system strategically emerges to choke and strangle neighboring trees and bushes. The birds of the air are fond of its seasonal berries and carry them to distant locations where fresh 'roots of bitterness' can be planted in unsuspecting territory. One cannot control where they will land.

When we fir ...

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving." (Colossians 3:23-24).

As Christians, we are called upon to be enthusiastic about what we do. The word 'enthusiasm' is derived from the Greek words 'en' and 'theos', meaning 'in God'. When w ...

No one doubted the ability of Jean Francois Gravelot, better known as the Great Blondin, to walk a 1300 foot tightrope across the gorge just below the Niagara Falls. Since announcing his planned attempt in June of 1859, he had not only successfully walked across the steep cliffs above the thundering river but continually added a host of entertaining stunts to his routine. Before 10,000 spellbound spectators he walked mid-way across the gorge where he lowered a rope to a waiting steamboat, 'The Maid ...

This week, millions of believers observe historical events that have dramatically impacted their lives - the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth. The events that took place during the brief 33 years of Jesus' life on earth fulfill over 300 written prophecies in the Bible that anticipated the Messiah. They fit this unique TEST OF PROPHECY. Jesus lived a life that fully satisfied the objective moral base codified in the law of Moses. His life fits the unique TEST OF RIGHTEOUSNESS. He pu ...

Open your eyes today and you will discover that you are a part of a magnificent work of creation. Whether you study astronomy, biology, physics, or chemistry, the evidence of observable phenomena infers by logical necessity the existence of an intelligent Designer behind the intelligible design in the natural world.

The scientist JOHANNES KEPLER described science as "thinking God's thoughts after Him."

ALBERT EINSTEIN said, "Everyone who is ser ...

The longest running play in London's theater history is "The Mousetrap". In true Agatha Christie style, the audience is kept in suspense until the last scene when the detective puts all of the clues together and solves the mystery. Then what actually happened at the time of the crime, previously unseen and unsuspected by the theater-goer, is made known. They are told to keep the conclusion a secret lest they spoil the surprise of future audiences. They exit the theater with that special l ...

"Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest." (Proverbs 6:6-8 NIV).

The Bible tells us to "Go to the ant," to "consider its ways and be wise." What observations can be made as you observe an ant colony? An inner-wisdom appears to guide the ant t ...

The artist creates a painting with a forward look. The artist sees the possibilities of an idea being expressed through color and brushstroke on the canvas. While others see a rough piece of marble or alabaster, a sculptor sees a finished figure. The architect sees an elegant building while others see piles of dirt and steel on a construction site. The scientist sees the possibilities of a cure to a disease as he labors on endless experiments in the laboratory. The athlete sees the possibility of w ...

We all need regular opportunities to recharge mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. There is wisdom in having a Sabbath rest built into the seven day cycle of our workweek. The principle of Sabbath is more than ancient 'hand-me-down' wisdom.

Archers called bows that did not send arrows toward designated targets "deceitful," "treacherous" and "unreliable" (Psalm 78:57; Hosea 7:16). A bow would become deceitful if it went for too long a p ...

"Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who  correctly handles the word of truth." (2Timothy 2:15).

There have been far too many spiritual casualties of 'religious wars'. Many people have come under false guilt and condemnation, needlessly slain by carelessly fired 'Bible bullets'. Others have been taken captive by legali ...

(In memory of Dexter Scantlebury, who played the role of Evangelist in New Life Drama Company's 1996 musical adaptation of 'Pilgrim's Progress' titled "Celestial City". He who pointed the way to freedom's narrow gate entered the Celestial City where there is no curse on Feb. 15, 1998)

Michael Bell wrote a poem one Good Friday morning, titled "The Cross". The last lines read:

And I sa ...

An Appeal to Wisdom

We tend to overestimate human wisdom. Some denounce Christianity as being a 'simplistic solution' or as the evolution of 'primitive myth'. They turn a blind eye to historical testimony and the coherence of the Christian's world view with reality. Preferring to perceive life as a game in which they perform the winning move, they turn away from any notion that they need to be rescued by someone outside of themselv ...

The following is a thought-provoking illustration that has been passed down through the centuries: The time of the Last Judgment has arrived. God sits upon the Great White Throne. Behind Him is a curtain. Before Him are lined up those who are to be judged. Each one is called to give an account. As they do, God gives a signal and a stunningly radiant person of unspeakable beauty emerges from behind the curtain and stands opposite the one whose life is being scrutinized. When asked the identity of th ...

Our personal life journeys have their unique twists and turns. Each new day faces us with unique challenges. We have the power to choose how we will respond to them.

When the children of Israel were grumbling about their limited resources and the restricted life-style imposed on them by their deliverance from their Egyptian bondage, God gave them bread from heaven (Exodus 16:4). He also said that He would test them in doing this.

The reaction of the community ...

Leadership Lessons from the Life of Joseph

Bible scholars have listed up to 100 details in the story of Joseph in Genesis 37-50 that parallel the life and personal character of Jesus Christ. This makes him one of the greatest 'types' of Christ in the Bible.

Certainly Joseph demonstrated one of the most godly attitudes towards life's circumstances. Like Jesus, Joseph was the beloved son of his father, a good shep ...

7 Encounters of the Faith-Building Kind

In the Bible, Abram, later called Abraham, is recognized as 'friend of God' and 'father of our faith'. Both of these titles are remarkable considering the condition he was in when God first began to deal with him. Originally Abraham was a stranger to God and had no demonstrable faith when he was living in his hometown of Ur of the Chaldeans. God brought him out of his comfort zone by stirring ...

"It is a land the LORD your God cares for; the eyes of the LORD your God are continually on it from the beginning of the year to its end." (Deuteronomy 11:12 NIV).

Moses reminds the people of Israel that the promised land they were to possess in the new year would be one that the Lord cares for and continually watches over. His eyes are on it "from the beginning of the year to it ...

"The shepherds went back to work, glorifying and praising God for everything they had heard and seen, which had happened just as they had been told." (Luke 2:20 J.B. Phillips).

It's especially challenging to get back to work after the Christmas holidays. The festivities of the season break up our calendars with enough change of setting and schedule to help us detach from the daily grind and fo ...

"But the angel said to them, 'Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people.'" (Luke 2:10 NIV)

"Remain in me...remain in my love...obey my commands...that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete." (John 15:9-13 NIV)

Jesus said that he ...

It is easy for a Scrooge to react with a scowling grunt of 'humbug!' to the people and situations around him he considers bothersome. We are more ready to blame the rest of the world for going sour than admit our own cantankerousness. We are mentally self-programmed to justify our words and actions so much that we believe they emerge out of our own sweet and unsullied sincerity. How can there be any 'sin' in sincere? We excuse our self-indulgence by saying "After all, I'm just being real. I'm ...

The following is an anonymous nineteenth century composition that you might want to pass along during this holiday season:

ONE SOLITARY LIFE

"He was born in an obscure village, the child of a peasant woman. He grew up in another village, where He worked in a carpenter shop until He was thirty. Then for three years He was an itinerant preacher. He never wrote a book. He never held an office. He never had a f ...

'Faith' is one of the most misunderstood words in the Christian's vocabulary. It is often confused with 'belief'. Faith is more than belief. A belief is a mental acceptance, personal conviction or an ideological persuasion. Wars, acts of terrorism and horrible atrocities have resulted from people going to battle with their 'beliefs'. Shameful acts of hatred have been perpetrated in the name of Christ by those who held Christian 'beliefs' but failed to exercise Christian 'faith'.

A missionary with Africa Evangelical Fellowship included a copy of the following letter. The author is unknown, but is believed to be a young pastor in Zimbabwe who was martyred for his faith in Jesus Christ. It was found in his study:

"I'm part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have the Holy Spirit's power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made -- I'm a disciple of his. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, ...

The Spirit of Wisdom and Revelatio

Here in New England we are accustomed to a variety of inclement weather patterns: hurricanes, northeasters, blizzards and heat waves. While living in England we would often experience what we called, 'pea soupers'; periods of thick fog. The fog would be so dense that we literally would not be able to see 5 feet in front of our faces. Traffic would come to a standstill. On one occasion, we were dri ...

Today a relentless barrage of words, images, sound bites and slogans politicize every issue and event. Survey data is packaged to bolster whatever opinion is preferred. A media blitz in itself can shape public sentiment without ever having to appeal to facts. This manipulative treatment of information has become such a part of our culture that we have become quite accustomed to it. We are feeding on short, simplistic, pre-digested, emotionally laden, one-stop conclusions.

Britis ...

In business circles there has been a lot of discussion in recent years about developing a corporate culture with the clear communication of vision, internalization of core values and contagious passion for your particular company's mission. These components have proved to have more persuasive and permeating power than the circulation of thick procedural and policy manuals.

Jesus spent three years orientating His select team to the vision, values and passionate agenda of the King ...

Career fulfillment does not come by gaining recognition or attaining a desired income. It comes by aligning and engaging with our true vocation. Our job (occupation) is not necessarily equal to our calling (vocation). Our job may be a means towards which we fulfill our calling. A person might have the God-given vocation of raising a family. Their present job may be just a means of providing the necessary income for the fulfi ...