The phrase 'falling in love' can be misleading, as if the experience of love were merely accidental. Somehow you tripped, stumbled and were overcome by an abstract force. Real love involves a conscious choice. Often 'falling in love' is a trick that our hormones and imaginations play on us. People fall in love not with another person but with their 'idea' of who that other person is and what their relationship will be like in the future. There is an element of reality distortion as they imagine riding off into the sunset with their 'perfect catch'.

I prefer the phrase 'rising in love'. This implies that you have a vision to grow in a love that is intentional, unconditional, long-lasting and real. Far from being a passive victim to your imagination or feeling, you are committed to being proactive in taking your love-life to new heights. You have a vision to transcend lesser loves and experience the love of God.

Even if our first acquaintances may appear to be serendipitous, long-term relationships do not improve by accident. How do married couples stay in love? How do friendships become sustaining, redemptive, long-term relationships? How do you rekindle the flame of love and loyalty? How is love and trust maintained in relationships?

Our lives need to be "rooted and established in divine love." (Ephesians 3:17). To be rooted in anything less will produce the wrong fruit; the kind of fruit that sabotages long-term relationships.

The Apostle Paul prayed that the indwelling Spirit of Christ would become more obvious in the lives of Christ's followers. He prayed that all those who came in contact with believers would come in contact with the love of God. He prayed that all Christians would 'rise in love' (See Ephesians 3:16-20).

There are four words for 'love' in the common Greek language. Three represent loves that are instinctively a part of our nature and most common to the human experience: NATURAL ATTRACTION (eros); NATURAL AFFECTION (storge); and NATURAL ASSOCIATION (phileo - the warm familiar love of mutuality). The fourth word for love is one that transcends the natural: SUPERNATURAL AGAPE-LOVE. The word 'agape' describes the supreme cherishing value that God ascribes to a person. Agape is the love of selfless concern; self-giving and self-sacrifice. It has its origin in the heart of God.

To 'rise in love' is to aspire to the love of God to the degree that it dominates our affections and will. This hope does not have to be frustrated "because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." (Romans 5:5).

This love surpasses natural knowledge, transcending our natural instincts. The Amplified Bible translates Paul's prayer: "May Christ through your faith actually dwell-settle down, abide, make His permanent home - in your hearts! May you be rooted deep in love and founded securely on love, that you may have the power and be strong to apprehend and grasp with all the saints (God's devoted people), the experience of that love, what is the breadth and length and height and depth of it" (Ephesians 3:17-18).

Consider the dimensions of His love: ITS BREADTH. His love is universal. He is willing to forgive and accept ALL who would escape the judgment that abides upon our sin-stained, corrupted and rebellious human nature, by coming to Him through faith in the Savior, Jesus Christ (John 3:16-17).

IT'S LENGTH. He loved us before the foundation of the world (Ephesians 1:3-6). He plans to love us forever. In fact, He will continually astonish us with the unfolding demonstration of His kindness towards us throughout the future ages! (Ephesians 2:7). His love never quits! (1Corinthians 13:4,8,13). Nothing can separate us from His love! (Romans 8:37-39).

NATURAL LOVE says - "I will love you until you offend me." DIVINE LOVE says "I love you in spite of the fact that you never stop offending me."

NATURAL LOVE says: "I love you because I am attracted to you", or "because you make me feel better about myself." Or "because you are kind to me." DIVINE LOVE says: "I love because it is my nature to do so. You exist, so you get loved."

NATURAL LOVE says: "I love you until I find someone who looks better." DIVINE LOVE says: "You look perfect in Christ Jesus. I love you forever."

CONSIDER ITS HEIGHT: His love is unsurpassable. Nothing can top it. He has raised us up to the highest heights with Himself. "Because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions--it is by grace you have been saved. And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus" (Ephesians 2:4-6 NIV).

CONSIDER ITS DEPTH. His love meets us at our lowest point. It is totally accessible. He meets us while we are dead in the depths of our sin. Jesus Christ identified with our lowest state, when He was baptized into the death our sins deserved on the Cross. The Psalmist said: "Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there" (Psalm 139:7-8). He is 'the hound of heaven' ready to meet us wherever we may be. As Corrie TenBoom said: "There is no pit so deep that God's love is not deeper still."

This is the kind of love that can cause our relationships to flourish. O wonderful love! Let us have vision for our relationships; that the love of God would monopolize our thoughts and feelings and motivate our actions!