Now it came about when he had finished speaking to Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as himself."  (1 Sam 18:1 NASB)

Aristotle defined friendship as one soul in two bodies.  You would think that he was describing Jonathan and David.  The Bible teaches that, although each soul is distinct and precious, it is possible to have our souls knit together in the loving bonds of friendship.

Jonathan and David were best of friends.  The benefits of their friendship were that

1. It was based on a covenant of love and trust. 
2. They committed themselves to the Lord for each other. (1 Sam 20:42) 
3. They were better off spiritually and morally together than they were apart. They had the benefit of mutual encouragement and accountability which provided a deterrent to sin. 
4. They were willing to make sacrifices to let each one rise to their potential in God's plan; Jonathan transferred his rights to the throne because he recognized the hand of the Lord on David's life. 
5. They shared great dreams for each other. Each one believed in their friend more than their friend believed in himself.
6. They spoke well of each other (1 Sam 19:4) 
7. They had a blank check commitment to each other- Whatever the other needed they would be willing to supply. (1 Sam 20:4) 
8. They expected covenant loyalty from each other. (1 Sam 20:14-17) 
9. They strengthened each other to find their strength in God (1 Sam 23:16).
10. They vowed to protect each other and show kindness to each others' families.

The concept of 'friend' is not taken lightly in the Bible. " A man of many friends comes to ruin, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." (Prov 18:24 NASB)  The first Hebrew word 'many friends' (raya) speaks of associates, colleagues and neighbors.  We might call this 'friendship lite'.  It is fair-weather friendship. Relationship without commitment.  Pseudo community.  We get on well with each other as long as we don't get too deep, unearth diversity of opinion or take any responsibilities for each other.  We are companions as long as we can still wear our masks, don't invite accountability or dare to be tender and expose vulnerabilities. The second word ('ahab, aw-hab') speaks of strong affection. We actually become like brothers and sisters; sometimes closer than natural kin. This is true friendship.

Covenant relationships enable us to experience a strong sense of kinship.  Relationship building, like prayer, witnessing and Bible study, is a spiritual activity.  The discipling process is about bringing people into a closer friendship with God and with others.  The New Testament gives us over 30 relational ('one another') commands.

A true friend will not deliberately embarrass you; will not make a joke at your expense; will not speak evil of you behind your back; and will love at all times (Prov 17:17).  A true friend will not deceive you; will cover a multitude of sins; forbear your growth areas, but also lovingly confront when it is helpful to do so.  A true friend keeps confidences, will be consistent and trustworthy. A true friend will not leave you comfortless and will not let you face a trial alone. A true friend will be ready to stand up for you. A true friend will also be willing to lay down his or her life.

The more we examine the qualities of friendship, the more we realize how perfectly Jesus Christ fits the bill. He was a friend to publicans and sinners. He defines what is means to be a friend (John 15:13-15).

It is rare to find a man or woman who has covenant love (Hebrew word-hesed). (Prov 20:6 NIV).  Many a man claims to have unfailing love (covenant love), but a faithful man who can find?

Are you taking steps towards  'covenant love' by building trust or are you taking steps away from covenant love by being unreliable, inconsistent, and unfaithful in your relationships?  

Let the covenant love of Christ inspire us to revolutionize society with the simple reality that we are loving each other as true friends.